Don’t Finance Her
This article is a feature post by my good friend and fellow Alabama A&M University alum Mark Gladden. Mark’s website is amileinmyshoes2016.wordpress.com and he wrote a blog post about dating and the finances involved with it.
Check it out below
I’ll never forget when a woman I had a class with, approached me and asked me to help her with her project. She offered to cook for me at her place or take me out to a restaurant of my choice. Being the nice guy that I am, I would’ve helped her without the incentives. But she was offering free food and sometimes I get hungry so who would turn that down? Anyway, we were in the library working on her assignment when she asked me where I wanted to go eat. I picked the location and right after that, she got on the phone and asked another man for $40. Then, she looked at me with a smile and said “Hold up, I’ll be right back…the money is coming”…
Cool story, right? But here’s the point I’m trying to make:
Don’t be the money. Don’t be a fool. Don’t be a sucka.
Don’t finance her.
What do I mean by that? Don’t give a female money (or gifts) in hopes of obtaining her attention, love, or affection.
3 out of every 5 men will spend their money in hopes of getting a woman’s attention or to get her in bed. I just made that statistic up, but I’m pretty sure it’s accurate. Somewhere on this planet, a man is consistently spending money on a female he hasn’t dated or had sex with…and he never will. I can’t speak from experience because I’m very stingy with my money and attention, but I have been told plenty of stories. I personally know men who have been used by women who weren’t the slightest bit interested in them romantically. Woman have admitted to me that they have used guys that they didn’t like for money. I just can’t sit around and not say anything about this.
Know your worth, fellas. You shouldn’t have to pay for a woman’s attention and affection. If that is not your girl, don’t spend any money on her. Once you realize women don’t hold every man to the same standard, the wiser you’ll be when you deal with women. She might require you to take her on expensive dates, but the guy she really likes won’t have to spend a dime on her to keep her attention. As they say on Twitter, “The game is the game”.
Now….there is nothing wrong with wanting to take a woman out on a date and spend time with her. There is nothing wrong with wanting to do something nice for a woman you’re fond of. The problem with that is most men are looking for an return on their investment. Not only is that not genuine, but I wouldn’t hold my breath on it. These women are not obligated to do anything for you in return, and they certainly won’t. If you’re going to do something for a woman, don’t expect anything in return. Do it out of the kindness of your heart and nothing more.
There is also nothing wrong with spending money on your girlfriend. If that’s your queen, spoil her. That’s what you’re supposed to do. But don’t be a fool either. She supposed to be spoiling you in return. If you find yourself doing all the spoiling/spending in the relationship, then stop. I suggest you go find you another woman as soon as possible.
Lastly….I have to add this because some men are just dumb. If you approach a female flaunting how much money you have, that’s all she is probably going to want from you. If you start out splurging and buying her expensive gifts, she is going to expect that to be the norm. You’re going to have to keep that up to keep her. Also, if she has expressed that she is not interested in you, showering her with money and gifts probably won’t change that. So don’t even try it. Some men have nobody to blame but themselves when they get used for their coins. I’m just putting it out there. Be smarter. Do better. Just make sure you’re not saved in some woman’s phone as “Free Food” with a pizza emoji.
Be careful who you invest your time and money in.